Little kicker

Dear Owen,

So I was just looking at these photos of you from our last trip to the beach with you last summer...

 

 

 

Needless to say YOU LOVED THE BEACH!  Just like your Momma!  You, unlike your brothers, didn't cry the first time I put your feet in the ocean.  We were in Hilton Head and as soon as I put your feet in the Atlantic Ocean for the first time, you immediately started to kick your feet and laugh with joy.  You loved it!  You had a smile on your face the entire time!  I hate to tell you once again that I am sad but I just started BAWLING here at my desk thinking of you laying there on the towel, kicking your feet in utter joy and happiness.  Your legs use to go CRAZY every time you were laying around and your brothers were jumping around beside you.  You would giggle like crazy and kick your feet in pure excitement.  It almost looked like you were trying to run around with them.  I guess now that you are in Heaven I can think about you running around with them when I see a butterfly chase them in the backyard or the breeze blow by their jerseys as they run around the soccer field.

I am crying because I realize that your new baby sibling is going to probably kick his or her feet in total joy, the same way you did but it won't be you.  I know I will love your little brother or sister just as much as I love you and your older brothers but I will always miss seeing the joy on your face and in your big beautiful brown eyes when you kicked your feet with joy.  I think that was one of the hardest things about seeing your body after your soul went to be with God was not seeing your beautiful brown eyes light up with joy and your legs kicking with delight.  You were my little kicker, both in and outside the womb!  Your little sibling is not nearly the kicker that you once were.

What I would give to see you now, 1 year 2 months old, running around with those little chubby legs.  You had a little birth mark on your left leg that I always rubbed when I fed and rocked you.  It really stood out on your beautifully chubby legs.  You can see it in the photo below.  I still cant' believe how big you were for a 4 month old in these pictures - WOW!  I guess all your kicking wore you out this day because you passed out as we took a walk in the stroller on the beach.  All that fresh air and excitement with the sounds of the rolling waves! 

 

As your auntie Katie W would say, may you be resting like this in paradise.  Paradise has always been the beach to me so now as the weather gets warmer and I prep to head to the Outer Banks of NC with my friends this weekend, I will always think of you when I am at the beach (not that I don't think about you all the time already!!!!!!!!!).  I know you will be there with me in spirit and I will try and remember the kicks of joy as I take in all the beauty and joy that the beach offers.

 

I love you to Heaven and back my little kicker.

 

Love,

Your one and only Mom